This topic is probably a little to personal and for a second your gonna see a girl named Sara, not nessasarily Diem.
So, this morning on read on Twitter about Domenic Kane hitting 2 girls and thats been on my mind all morning. For those of you who dont know my short little story about how I got into porn, I was engaged to this one guy and everything was great I was ever going to have to work a day in my entire life. One night he came home in a drunken rage and took his anger out on me and beat me to the point where I had to make a hospital vist.
For the longest time I never really understood why a girl would be with someone who had anger problems like that.I guess what people dont really understand is half the time the girl doesnt even know that her boyfriend/husband is as crazy as he is. I can even relate to the girls who stick around because it is very very scary to leave someone as violent as they are in fear of them goinga step further than last time. It seriously is scary. To this day I still have nightmares. My heart really does go out to the 2 girls who just recently been attacked because I can tell you first hand how terrifying that really is. When someone is so much bigger and stronger than you and you have no way of really defending yourself it is the absolute worst and scariest feeling you can imagine.
This is my first time ever publicly speaking out about my incident and how I feel and whatnot, and thats the problem. There are SO many other women who are in the same boat as me who never spoke out or never did anything about it. For the past 7 months I very seldomly spoke about it and just hid it in the closet and pretended like it never happened. It happened. It made me stronger. It made me voice my opinion.
For more info on domestic violence or to donate go to: http://www.ncadv.org/
I am totally pissed right now! I hope someone reads this! I just typed for a half hour pouring all these crazy emotions out related to this blog, all for my laptop to die!! So, I'm attempting one more time only because this whole blog blew my mind. All I can say entirely is Fn WOW! I didnt hear anything of the 2 very unfortunate ladies being attacked but my heart truely does go out to them. I have physically abused for the majority of my dating career that started at the age of 14 when my first "real" boyfriend took my virginity then soon after used me as a punching bag. From the age of 14 until the age of 27 I was consistently getting physically abused. I'm no angel but I honestly dont recall doing anything to any of them that would enrage them so bad they wanted hurt me. I am 30 now and every single day of the past 3 years I have been so thankful that I am no longer being abused by a man. The broken bones, the bruises from head to toe, the scar all over, and the shattered teeth will all eventually heal or be repaired however the memory will never fade unfortunately. I will never forget how helpless I felt being naturally impaired physically to the opposite gender, the feelins will always surface immediately with any kind of confrontation, and personally with it being so repetitive in my life for those few years I really don't know if I will ever truely regain a sense of security with a man. I also had to learn the hard way, a man whom has put his hands on a woman in the past will do it again! they always say they made a huge mistake just one time, or try to justify it by giving all the ghory details of what the woman did to deserve it. Regardless their "excuse" for beating on a woman the point is, THEY ARE STILL WOMEN and generally defenseless to a man, besides violence doesn't resolve anything! I am currently involved with someone. Its nothing serious, more of a really good friendship. He is very supportive in general, seems like a great guy! He has promised me several times that I do not have to fear him ever striking me, he actually often says " 3 things I absolutely,absolutely will not tolerate is cruelity to women, cruelity to children, or cruelity to animals" Totally Awesome motto!!. . . . And I totally believed him until I read Diems blog!
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